Remember

The staff at First Farragut have been trying to get me to update my pictures since losing nearly 50 pounds. I've told them I didn't want to do that until I reach my goal (nearly 50 pounds, isn't 50 pounds). However, I have posted a picture of my thumb from last night on this blog.

It was our Ash Wednesday Service that caused the "dirt" under my fingernail. I always try, after the imposition of ashes, to get the black ashes out from under my thumbnail. It never works. No amount of hand sanitizer or scrubbing will work. My eldest commented that next year he thinks he'll get the sign of the cross on the back of his hand instead of on his forehead (an option we give at First Farragut). The reason he gave caught me. He said that the ashes on his forehead sort of hurt, burned. I've thought of that when I've been making the cross on people's forehead. The ashes are wet and grainy, and you can feel it "scratching" across the skin.

The imposition of ashes is about remembering. "Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return." It is a powerful moment for me. I usually have the hardest time with kids. My very first funeral was for a 6 year old who had drowned. It is a memory I carry with me. Children are so precious. Having had such a difficult process putting our family together, having children is a very special gift. The thought that children are dust and that they might return to dust too soon, makes it very emotional for me.

It happened last night. Perhaps my biggest break down in ash imposition history. It wasn't a child, it was Phil Scheuneman. I made it to "Remember that you are dust ..." and the images of his beautiful wife going through cancer and dying last year flooded my mind ... too soon ... Phil's loving spirit, gracious and generous ... their children ... and it happened ... I couldn't finish "... and to dust you shall return." It felt like forever before I could go on ...

BIT: Remembering can be painful. Ashes aren't easily removed from under your thumbnail and they do grit into our forehead. But remembering that we are mortal helps us to appreciate and celebrate the new life God gives us in Christ. Mortal remembered, eternal life celebrated. Paul puts it this way, "When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "'Death has been swallowed up in victory.'" (1 Corinthians 15: 54)

Is it not the same with Easter and Resurrection? How can we fully appreciate and celebrate Easter and Resurrection without the pain and suffering of the Crucifixion?

BITTER: I have started my fasting on Thursdays (no, I'm not giving up facebook). Blessed Lent ... Let's journey together to Easter ... (It's more fun that way)